“Everything anti-business,” warn economists

Following George Osborne’s comments that charities are “anti-business,” top economists have warned that “almost everything is anti-business” because it “gets in the way of free-market neoliberal capitalism.”

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“Neoliberalism is a type of capitalism that assumes that everyone is exactly the same, that debt does not exist, and that only the best products will be purchased, and that is how we organise the world’s economy” explains Prof Steve Keen.

“But then I do not have the same shopping habits as Kim Kardashian, everyone I know has a mountain of debt from the bank, and McDonald’s are still selling burgers despite being made of horse testicles.”

Other economists agreed with Mr Osborne when he, today, criticised charities saying that they “stood in the way of the free market” but added that “there were so many other things more anti-business and anti-free market than charities.”

We spoke to Ha-Joon Chang, from the London School of Economics, who said he would add: “Banks, hedge funds, Piers Morgan, the Bank of England, government, Saturday morning telly, the European Union, and George Osborne” to the list of things more anti-business than charities.

“Charities help to keep people alive, to get them back an involved in society, to earn them money. When people have these basic needs covered then they can begin purchasing from businesses, leading to the free market.”

A spokesperson for the New Economics Foundation said that “banks are vampires, charities the blood donors keeping people alive. Without the charities, banks would get hungry.”

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